Healing on Sinking Sand – Poem

I’m broken and living on sinking sand

Trying to find my way through life but nothing is working

Hustle, they say but the nickel and dimes doesn’t add up to a dollar

Rent is due and bills overflow my mailbox

I run to the familiar and the familiar is unfamiliar

The unfamiliar gives me familiar feelings. Numbness

I’m alone. My soul is floating around somewhere and I’m trying to find it

I sit alone in my apartment trying to pray my way out of the confusion, hurt, and pain

It just leads me to more pain and the bottle

So I try to sleep it away. I don’t want to feel. I want to dream

I lay in the dark, in the closet

The darkness makes me feel at peace

The light is frightening. It represents daylight, smiles, and love

Dreams seem real, peaceful, and I can escape the pain of reality

I’m trying to heal on sinking sand and I have nowhere to go and no one to talk to

I’m leaving. I’m going to find my soul.

I’ll travel to an unfamiliar place may be to a different town

Soul searching. I’m going to find solid ground

Before I drown in the sinking sand. Soulless. Empty. Broken